People may think , oh all she ever goes on about is baby loss this baby loss that. Others may accept my passion for it , but not quite understand. I will try to explain . When I lost my boy, it was probably the most lonely time in my life. I felt that no one could possibly understand, partly because I was struggling to understand myself. Quickly, I saw people moving on with their lives , and I was just stuck. For me sharing what I was feeling on support pages helped me. It was a space where I could feel safe to share what I was feeling without being judged. The people on the page hadn’t necessarily had the same circumstances as me, but still they could recognise the feelings and thoughts I was having, and that lifted the loneliness for me.
I am so passionate about awareness because although I found my safe space through support pages, some people may never feel safe to share their feelings, and carry them round with them , staying with them for a life time. To be perfectly honest baby loss is a bit of touchy subject with some people, and I completely understand that for some they don’t know how to act , what to say or what to do. The truth is there is no right way. Whatever you feel is ok, there is no right or wrong way to feel.
Massive pressure is put on us from social influence, and that is what I feel needs to change. I am not afraid to talk about my loss, nor should anyone ever be, if they want to that is, if they don’t want to then that is their right too. What I went through is my own experience , and I don’t believe anyone has the right to tell me how I should or should not think or feel or even do. Counselling can offer that safe space when feelings can be felt without any judgement, like the support pages for me, this could help with the lonliness and feeling like no one understands, as well as any other feelings you are experiencing. The aim of this really is to say that I have learnt that you do not have to feel like you are alone.